Psychobabble
by clockwise.smile
Summary: Hinata, a newly appointed chuunin finds herself on guard duty for a recently captured Akatsuki member, and what she faces is not just a monster of a man.
1. Chapter 1

**Psychobabble**

Psychobabble (the use of language heaped with psychological references)

_Introduction_

* * *

The dark dungeons of Konohagakure were not without their own ghostly haunts. Deathly still fear lurked in the corners and hid in the shadows. The sound of heels coming down the stone steps long covered with moss echoed eerily. Hisses from the other cages, swears and other general forms of different profanity, including cowering didn't faze the newcomer.

Walking down the rather long corridor, where only the nastiest, horrid and inhuman of humans were beheld. Like a circus of freaks, there were some who didn't look natural, one containing three eyes, another with four too many arms and another with horns of a ram.

Only demons rustled here, lived in this dank hole; their own little slice of hell.

Tsunade came to a stop in front of a cage – thick bars and a rank smell of decaying blood and old death. A figure clothed in a black cloak with red clouds sat in the corner of the darkness, sprawled almost cattishly in the laziness of his posture.

The woman folded her arms under her breasts and straightened her spine, narrowed her eyes. "Akasuna no Sasori, former Suna nin with high credibility as a scientist and one of their greatest shinobi; you have been arrested for the following – Unlawful experimenting, murders of hundreds of Suna civilians and shinobi alike, suspicion of murdering the Third Kazekage and affiliating with the terrorist group aka the Akatsuki. What do you plead?"

He said nothing.

Tsunade went on, "And this is off the record, by the way. Anything said down here without a proper trial will be kept between only those down here."

"Aren't you supposed to hand me over to my own country so that they may deal with me? Isn't that a _law_ amongst all of _you_? Hand over _illegal aliens_ or _foreigners_ to their respected countries?" eyes the color of baked red clay watched from the dark.

Tsunade replied without missing a beat, "Yes Sasori, we are in fact required to hand you over to Suna, however due to your more recent criminal offences against Konoha, you will be staying with us for a while, by permission of Suna's current Kazekage."

"Who took that brat's place anyway? I'd love to know."

"'That brat' is still in office; Chiyo-sama sacrificed her life to bring him back to life."

"Sacrificed her life for his…even to the end she's a self righteous old woman, a firm believer in redemption." Red eyes cast an evil spell when they turned to Tsunade's hazel eyes, "Do you believe in redemption, Hokage-sama?"

Tsunade lifted her chin, "In most cases."

"Do you believe in it enough to allow your _ex-teammate_ Orochimaru to walk the line even if he did kill _Dan_?"

Tsunade took it that Orochimaru shared his exploits with Sasori while he'd still been affiliated with the Akatsuki. She looked him in the eye and kept a leash on whatever emotion may leak through accidentally, "Never. I'd kill him with my own fists."

Sasori clucked his tongue and sat back, maneuvering so he'd be a little more comfortable against the craggy rocks with a foot a concrete and another half foot of steel enforced behind the rock wall.

"How does Dan look now? Wrinkled, withered and worms crawling in and out of him like he was a _love hotel_?"

Tsunade's eyes went cold and hard. "You will be brought in for questioning for information about the Akatsuki tomorrow afternoon."

Sasori regarded her with a lazy look that embodied the expression of "the cat that ate the canary".

Tsunade walked back up the corridor, past the hisses and whispers and vulgarity. She walked past all of it, up the steps and ignored how her throat was beginning to close.

Akasuna no Sasori would be taken into the interrogation room and no matter how long it took – they would find the Akatsuki and bring them down. The Akatsuki were an abomination upon all of the countries, they were what all the daimyos and Kages feared – they were the representing symbol of total upheaval of the orderly world they had worked so hard to gain. They were the living breathing definition of anarchy.

It was because of this that no matter how great the jumps between the countries were, they all watched for them. However, due to their own hesitancy upon touching the sensitive subject of these terrorists, to many of their shinobi and civilians they remained nonexistent. Were they to tell them, what would happen?

Exactly what the Akatsuki would want to have happen. This was why they didn't keep themselves so secret; why they were amongst the public.

They wished not only to achieve their goal, but in order to attain it faster they wanted the leaders of these countries to make them public, to spread the disease of fear and panic through everyone. To let them know just how dangerous they are, to let them know what they believe the goals of the Akatsuki are – to let them know what they were.

If fear and panic spread, distrust would leak from the subjects to their substantial government. They would put the pieces together – the odd attacks, sudden kidnapping and killing of selective people at such a small number. The public would no longer place their trust in their government because the daimyos and Kages alike kept silent, wishing to not cause riots and chaos in the streets but had none the less lied to their loyal people.

The Akatsuki were madmen and this was a part of their goal that Tsunade refused to aid in any possible way.

In front of Tsunade, in the sun that was too bright for her feelings, stood the Hokage tower. Upon entering the building, she was attacked by her assistant Shizune. "Tsunade-sama, the Kazekage has contacted our office and wishes for authorization that he may come to talk to you personally about the prisoner's accommodations here."

Tsunade turned to walk up a flight of stairs, Shizune dogging at her heels while balancing Tonton and a stack of official papers. "Alright, tell him that he may and that he should leave immediately because incidentally, Ibiki has volunteered to interrogate Sasori."

Shizune saw the dark look over Tsunade's face and nodded. Her Hokage was serious. However, what else was there to do but interrogate and ultimately torture the Akatsuki member? Shizune frowned at the thought. Was it even possible to torture someone with a wooden body and no other internal organs save for his heart?

"Shizune, cancel the meeting with the council tomorrow, I'm going to drop in with Sasori and Ibiki and see if he has any sort of weakness we can exploit. I have no idea how we're going to force it out of him without threatening to kill him, since he's not a normal human. We don't even know if he has any pain receptors. I don't completely know how he is even fully functioning, or what his chakra circulatory system is like." Tsunade retained a grim face set.

Shizune nodded. "Should I go consult with Sakura about taking Sasori's guard duty?"

Tsunade paused in her steps. "I think Team Seven has enough to worry about already. I don't want to overstress the girl and cause a meltdown when their team is at its weakness."

"…Perhaps then, Neji?" Shizune offered.

Tsunade cocked her head and decided. "Between the two Hyuugas, Neji and Hinata – they will be the ones performing guard duty."

"Both Hyuugas? But won't Hiashi-sama protest to that, they being from such a prestigious clan?" Shizune tried but Tsunade shook her head.

"No, he won't be able to resist it once I make my decision – this is coming from the Hokage of the village, not just a councilmen member. He won't have any say in the matter."

Shizune nodded, consenting to that before she spoke again. "I can understand your decision with Neji; he's a strong and capable shinobi who can withstand a lot for his age and generation, but Hinata is…the complete opposite. For a grading system based on intelligence, she marks as high as Sasuke and Sakura, and she's able to adapt harder techniques and make her own out of them so she doesn't overexert herself. However, other than that…she is quite easily frightened and maybe even easily manipulated. I am opposed to the idea of Hinata being in distance with Sasori at all."

Tsunade looked over at Shizune, facing her fully. "I can understand your opposition and sentiments regarding her, but like Neji, she has the Byakugan. Byakugan users are well adept at sensing lies or tricks as they are the "all seeing eye". However, while Neji could simply do it on his own, Sasori is rather sexist. He will overlook Hinata much more than Neji and will completely underestimate her. It's just as you said Shizune, she is just as intelligent as Sakura or Sasuke. It's not that she's an idiot, she'd simply too shy to say anything which makes her an underhanded weapon against him should anything slip."

Shizune blinked at the explanation. "Why switch the Hyuugas off though? Why not keep only one of them as a guard so that Hiashi is not as bothered by the idea? Why the inconvenience?"

"Why? Because, to put it simply, if Hinata were to see him every day; I'm afraid that she may feel empathy for him or maybe as you said, manipulated by him. If Neji was to solely guard him, Sasori would do nothing – he's an arrogant shinobi, but he's not stupid. He'll see right through Neji and to his potential. Unfortunately for him, he still has the general pigheadedness regarding kunoichi, and he'll retain that attitude especially around Hinata because she's so timid."

Shizune looked over at Tsunade, "You're basically just going to use his own arrogance against him."

Tsunade gave a quick nod. "It's the only thing we've got on him right now."

Shizune bowed then, "I'll go write a reply to the Kazekage and make preparations for tomorrow." As she turned to leave, Tsunade called her back.

"Just write the letter to the Kazekage, cancel my appointments and remind Ibiki to be ready by noon tomorrow. I'll deal with Hiashi personally." Tsunade stated before she shooed Shizune off with her errands. Opening the door to her office, Tsunade found her chair and slumped in it.

Opening her desk drawer, she found the familiar neck of a liquor gourd and popped the cork off. Before drowning herself in her self-indulgent bad habit, she found herself thinking "what _would_ tomorrow bring"?

* * *

**Ending Notes**

Well that was exciting wasn't it? (note the sarcasm) Please take in mind that said prisoner is locked up and a **psychotic**,** terroristic madman**. There won't be a clandestine lover affair of any sort, so please bear that in mind. Also, FYI, I know that Sasori is loaded with badass things like a flamethrower, his "tail"/intestines and numerous other things, but that will be covered next chapter. Hinata and Neji also make their appearance next chapter, obviously and so do Ibiki and Gaara.

Anyway, how was it so far? R&R please?


	2. Chapter 2

**Psychobabble**

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* * *

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Ibiki stared at the man before him. The redheaded puppeteer had always been a person to fear, even before he became a renegade shinobi. His techniques had evolved far past mere puppetry. His hands were currently shackled, and Ibiki had deactivated the flamethrowers in his palms, the containers filled with poisoned senbon, and had a close encounter with his swords in his back.

The man was literally a one-man army.

Having taken off his Akatsuki cloak, and his shirt he was faced with the metal coils of his abdomen. A poisonous tail had taken the place of his intestines. His heart was in a fragile glass container with the scorpion symbol emblazoned on it. He had no lungs; the swords had taken the place of them, no liver, pancreas…nothing.

He was hollowed out shell of a man with weapons fitting this way and that. His heart pumped, alive but he had no blood veins in his body. Ibiki couldn't comprehend how his body was still warm like a regular person's when there was no blood, maybe it was the small gas pouches for the flamethrowers, or his chakra was that well wired.

Ibiki opened his arms and chest cavity to get a closer look at his chakra veins. His chakra veins however, speaking of which, were completely different to what Ibiki suspected. They weren't excessively large as though they were on steroids for the purpose of storing more chakra. Ibiki studied the veins in fascination, they looked normal, but a second coil of veins were wrapped around the chakra veins.

What _was_ he?

Ibiki's facial expression must have changed drastically because Akasuna no Sasori snickered in a low tone at him. "What do you think?" In all actuality, Sasori wanted to kill this man for opening him up, but he couldn't very well do that since his systems had been deactivated and he was doped up with three different sedatives. He was in no position to do anything.

Ibiki looked at him sharply; the scars on his formidable face caused his frown to look even deeper. "What _are_ you?" he opted for the blunt way.

Sasori's grin was slow and psychotic even, showing his white teeth. "I am the epitome of what I have always believed in."

Ibiki stared at the renegade's angelic (if now insanely driven) face, knowing he was much older than he seemed. He frowned and then looked down momentarily, not to break eye contact from the red eyes, but inspiration stuck him suddenly.

"Do you still have your reproductive organs?" an idea to torture him may've come easy. Ibiki knew Sasori knew that even he said no, he could check anyway.

Sasori's grin never faltered and his eyes got wider, the whites showing past norm. He thrust his pelvis out, as far as the chains on his hands, arms and legs would allow, "See for yourself."

Ibiki stepped back; the prick knew there wasn't any way out of letting him check, so the bastard probably thought he might as well poke some fun at Ibiki before anything happened. He narrowed his eyes. "Don't mind me asking, but how is it you came to the decision to do something as bug-fuck crazy as this?"

Sasori's grin dropped and his wide eyes became half-lidded. "It's easy to envy something you aren't."

Ibiki raised a brow, "Don't rush ahead in your story now," he said dryly.

Sasori gave a lazy half-smile. "What makes you think you'll get a story anyway?"

The scarred man scowled at the reply given. "Every part of your body, except for your head and your heart is a weapon. Why didn't you remove Lieutenant Stiffy?"

Sasori sneered, "Would you remove something that painful?"

Ibiki gave him a flat stare. "You removed nearly everything else, so why not the whole nine yards?"

Sasori rolled his eyes slightly, "Not even I'm crazy enough to go that far, though Hidan may be." Ibiki frowned for a moment.

"The immortal priest?" Ibiki knew who he was; nearly everyone did because he'd murdered Asuma – though no one could find his body or his head, or his partner for that matter.

Sasori gave no response.

Ibiki looked over at him again, "I read your profile, courtesy of the people of Suna who want to see you dead. All those dead people and only some of them were turned into puppets. You into necrophilia? Is that why there's a lot of kunoichi you turned?"

Sasori lifted a thin red brow at Ibiki. "Why so curious of my sexuality? Disappointed or intrigued?"

Ibiki suppressed a shudder when the monster-man looked at him. "There are just a lot of women, pretty women – none of whom looked very strong."

"Kunoichi are those pretty little baubles you find and can't stop staring at, you can get caught up staring at them – some of them are eye catching." Sasori gave Ibiki a look out of the corner of his eye, "Those are some of the women who caught my eye." Ibiki stared at him, and felt a cold shiver run over his heart. He hadn't felt this way in years. This man, thing, beast – _monster_ was too much even for someone like him.

"What about the men?" Ibiki questioned.

"What else?" Sasori gave an open response.

Ibiki would piece it together later he decided when he heard the creak of the door opening. "Ibiki," the woman's feminine voice rang through strongly. Sasori also turned, his eyes widening when he caught sight of blonde hair. "We need to talk, the Kazekage is here." The scarred man nodded but a hiss from Sasori made him pause for a moment.

"I think if you interviewed your Hokage you'd understand me a little more."

Ibiki snapped his head over at Sasori who gave a vicious grin that didn't fit his innocent face at all.

Deciding to dig in on that later, Ibiki continued to the door and exited, leaving the mass murderer from Suna, the renegade and Akatsuki terrorist alone in the darkness of the cell, with the exception of the guards posted outside.

* * *

"Are there any other weaknesses on him?" Tsunade asked, pressing for the fourth time.

The red haired Kazekage and his two siblings looked at Ibiki with such precision that it left no doubt that they were related. Ibiki shook his head, "Just his heart and his reproductive organs. We could go for psychological damage, or taking him apart," the man shrugged and scratched at a scar.

Kankurou, the one in a full body suit and traditional war-paint on his face stepped forward and let his puppet drop to the floor. He frowned momentarily before looking over at his blonde sister, as if for permission. She gave a short nod.

Ibiki raised a brow, what was she – their freaking general?

"Akasuna no Sasori was the – _is_ the best puppeteer from Suna. He did things and invented things that nobody thought was even possible in any shape or form." Kankurou looked to the side before looking directly at Ibiki. "My belief in why he was so great is that he went insane, or drove himself to insanity."

Ibiki stared at him, "Drove himself insane?" he parroted.

The blonde haired kunoichi spoke now, "Sasori had been an orphan, and he'd been taken care of by his grandmother. She made puppets to resemble his parents, but in doing so…it led him to the belief that the only way to leave a lasting impression, like his parents hadn't been able to do, was to become a form of art."

"Art? Is that what he calls his puppets?"

Kankurou gave a short nod, "Lasting forever, so he ended up coming to the thought of making himself a lasting art."

Ibiki stared at the three siblings who gave him similar blank, grave looks. "How exactly did he make it out alive then?"

Temari gave a humorless chuckle, "Sheer force of will, amazing chakra control with just a dash of madness."

Ibiki nodded slowly. Something still stumped him though, everything else was fine, but this one was bugging him. "Why didn't he remove his other organs?" Ibiki was still curious if there was an ulterior motive behind it.

Kankurou's face almost became disgusted or pained, or both. "Would _you_ remove something that painful?"

"Kankurou," a deep voice interrupted and Ibiki unconsciously found himself tensing at the voice. It was commanding, powerful and subtly confident – just like any leader's voice should be. The red haired Kazekage was addressing his brother. "Be more respectful," he said, glancing first at his brother in rebuke, then to his sister. She gave a small smile, as if congratulating him.

"Well, something like that is too crazy for even Sasori to do. It'd hurt like hell and I don't think any guy would wanna part with it." Kankurou began to mumble the last part but Ibiki could've laughed at it.

Temari elbowed her younger brother, "We came here to talk about an S-class renegade, not how much you love your ding-dong," she hissed before pinching him and motioning for Gaara to talk.

Ibiki snorted, and Tsunade coughed but Gaara seemed oblivious to this – probably too used to it by now. He looked directly at Tsunade, "Tsunade-sama, how long do you plan on keeping Sasori in Konoha's custody?"

Tsunade shrugged, "It depends on you, Gaara, we'll hand him over to Suna immediately if you like, or we could set a deadline. We were going to interrogate him for information."

Gaara stared at her for a long moment. "Suna could just as well interrogate him, and we would alert you to any information so what is it you're concerned over to ask Suna for his custody?"

The blonde woman smiled, but it wasn't a nice smile. The brat was too smart and curious for this to go over easily. "We just wanted to lighten to load over Suna; he did kill you after all and was nearly the death of your brother."

The Kazekage's black rimmed eyes narrowed. "Do you acknowledge that Konoha and Suna are allies?" he asked, suddenly and Ibiki tensed with Temari and Kankurou at the rising tension.

The Kazekage's older sister was at his back and looking between Ibiki and Tsunade, almost distrustfully and after the attack on her brother, Ibiki couldn't blame her for holding suspicions.

Tsunade's hazel eyes took Gaara in like she would an opponent. "Of course I know we're allies, Gaara."

"Then what is it you're hiding from us?" Gaara's voice was dangerous, edgy and distrustful.

"As my ally, Gaara, you're going to have to trust us."

A stare-off happened between the Hokage and Kazekage. "I will, but in return you will have to trust me."

Tsunade nodded slowly before letting out a sigh. "Alright, Ibiki, could you escort the Kazekage's siblings to the cafeteria, I'm sure they're hungry."

Ibiki took the hint and opened the door, "Follow me."

Kankurou exited and Temari looked at her shorter younger brother until he gave her nod, though she hesitantly left.

The door shut and Hokage and Kazekage were left alone.

Tsunade turned to Gaara with a jug of alcohol in her possession. "What do you want to know?" she offered him a cup that he declined.

Gaara's eyes met hers. "Whatever it is you're trying to hide from us."

* * *

Hiashi was mulling over the documents in front of him with utmost care. He kept rereading it to make sure that he missed nothing. Their Hokage was not someone who Hiashi could fully respect. Sarutobi had been an odd one, but wise and experienced and trustworthy.

This woman seemed untrue in her intentions and the thought of her made Hiashi's well kept control teeter almost dangerously.

What she wanted him to sign, agree and allow willingly was absolute ludicrous. She wished him to sign over Neji, the clan's prodigy and Hinata, his daughter and heiress to the clan's title, to guard an S-class renegade who made puppets out of people.

His hand was poised with an ink brush recently dipped. Hiashi hadn't noticed that his hand was trembling from the outrage over the lack of respect Tsunade showed to the Hyuuga clan.

Hiashi felt a cold smear on his hand and he looked down to spot ink marks on the side of his palm and on his haori sleeve. He felt a tic in his eye. There was a knock on the wooden frame of the shoji door; Hiashi could see the two outlines of who it was. "Enter."

With their heads bowed low, his daughter and his nephew entered respectfully before taking their seats on cushions, Neji seated behind to the left of Hinata. Hiashi pinched the bridge between his eyes and let out a sigh. "Hinata, Neji both of you have been assigned a C-class mission. The Hokage is asking me permission to allow you to undertake this. You've been assigned to become alternate guards for Akasuna no Sasori. Do either of you know who he is?"

Neji looked up, "Akasuna no Sasori?"

Hiashi gave a curt nod.

"He's a renegade from Suna, a supposed master puppeteer." Neji responded, drawing from what he could remember about him from the Bingo books.

Hiashi gave a small nod before looking at his daughter. She bit her lip, "He used those he defeated as puppets and eventually made himself a puppet." Neji looked over slightly at Hinata and Hiashi's brows raised a decibel.

"How did you know that?" he questioned, wondering how his daughter was privy to this sort of information.

"Sakura and Akasuna no Sasori's grandmother were the ones to hold Sasori back and they captured him…Sakura fought against him."

"And she told you this?"

"She described him as the worst sort of monster." Hinata said quickly, amending her mistake because Sakura, in her moment of weakness had confessed to Ino and Hinata how much that insane shinobi had frightened her.

"Whether he is or isn't a monster isn't the question. If it were actually my choice as a guardian, I would flat out refuse this. However, the Hokage has the entire council backing her so it really isn't in my hands anymore. They're giving the both of you the choice to take it or leave it."

Neji responded immediately, "I will take it, Uncle."

Hiashi suspected that much from Neji, "Hinata?"

Hinata chewed her lip, remembering from the Bingo books, and from Sakura's descriptions of what Sasori was like. He was undoubtedly evil, cunning and positively mad.

Hinata knew she had improved over the years, but so had everyone else and she wouldn't risk becoming a thorn in Konoha's side should something go wrong because of her. Physically and mentally she was stronger, but Sakura said that Sasori could wedge hurt deep into you without touching you.

Psychologically, Hinata knew Akasuna no Sasori would be able to break her and threaten Konoha.

She bowed her head, "I-I will have to decline the mission, I'm very sorry."

Hiashi nodded, he'd been hoping his heir would decline it. Neji was a Branch House member and much more advanced than his younger cousin – but besides that, Hinata was female. The man she would have to help guard was a ruthless renegade from Suna, where kunoichi weren't held in high regard in the first place, but a male.

A female guarding a male who was much more experienced and cruel and vicious in the most malevolent ways was just begging for trouble.

"I will inform the Hokage tomorrow. You are both dismissed." He nodded to Hinata and then to Neji, both of whom bowed politely. Hinata was the first to stand and leave, followed closely by her cousin.

The cousins left Hiashi alone with his thoughts before he signed the document, leaving the second one blank of his signature and thumbprint.

Hokage or not, Hiashi refused to let his daughter guard the puppeteer from the red sands.

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Second chapter out! I know I know, no Hyuuga to Sasori interaction yet but that will come in the next chapter. It'll be a slow build up until I'll attempt to scare the crap out of my audience. :3

kawaiiihina123 brought up an excellent point: **How did they capture him?**

It'll be brought into light a little later so please wait!

Read and review, please and thanks!


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